We asked you what events should be part of the Olympic programme-you came back with these. Anyone up for a quick round of Panataloon Canoodling?
Yesterday we glumly ruminated on the fact that surfing wasn’t an Olympic sport. We then asked you to name the other sports you think should be included. The choices that came back were extremely varied, from the strange, to the stupid, to the down-right concerning.
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Brodie Smithers Kabbadi
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Tom Young Elephant Polo
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Der Heckler projectile vomitingJuly 25 at 3:00pm · · 1
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Ben McAleer Midget tossing.July 25 at 3:02pm via mobile ·
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Firas Qazi breast slapping.July 25 at 3:02pm · · 1
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Gus Freeman joustingJuly 25 at 3:02pm · · 1
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Cat Gowan takraw! best spectator sport EVER imo
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Ed Morton The Crystal Maze.
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Alan Bourke Surfing - what happens if there’s a big high pressure front and therefore no waves?
Half the stuff in the Olympics has no right being there - it should be fastest, highest, strongest, furthest. Golf, for fuck’s sake.July 25 at 3:12pm · · 1 -
Gus Freeman DartsJuly 25 at 3:16pm · · 3
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Martin Ross Marbles
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Howard Murphy Beard growing……and not the chin variety
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Howard Murphy GropingJuly 25 at 3:26pm · · 1
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Bog Stoke MMA
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Martin Quirk Darts should replace pistol and rifle shooting. No question about it. Infinitely more skill and dedication is involved in darts and I’ve yet to read, see or hear about some sexually-frustrated middle-class white American kid or Norweigian nazi going bat shit and using a set of tungsten arrers on a killing spree . You all know it makes sense.
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Howard Murphy Cha Cha Slide
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Howard Murphy Throwing things
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Howard Murphy 100 mtrs Saunter
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Darren Hillier Kabadi kabadi kabadi kabadi kabadi etc.July 25 at 3:40pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy German skipping
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Kerrie Cavanagh monkey tennisJuly 25 at 3:47pm · · 2
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Paul Finn Plank Dancing
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Howard Murphy Soggy biscuitJuly 25 at 4:04pm · · 1
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Paul Finn Most inappropriate sports kit. No wait.July 25 at 4:04pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy Call of Duty
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Paul Finn Typo. Swedish Plank Dancing.July 25 at 4:05pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy Eucharist Licking
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Paul Finn Love you long time table tennis.July 25 at 4:09pm via mobile ·
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Paul Finn The George Galloway Stare Of DeathJuly 25 at 4:10pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy C’mon Paul, we all know thats the name of your band.July 25 at 4:11pm · · 1
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Paul Finn Sneering
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Paul Finn Avoiding eye contact while eating a banana.
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Howard Murphy Upper class Twit EventJuly 25 at 4:14pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy the ladies East German shotput, (for ol times sake)July 25 at 4:15pm · · 1
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Paul Finn Cheeze baiting. Contestants must use cheeze or face disqualificationJuly 25 at 4:15pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy Pneumatic hammer throwing
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Howard Murphy The Strongest Bloke Event
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Howard Murphy The Ice T and / or Ice Cube lookalike event
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Paul Finn The Fred Willard shuffle.July 25 at 4:19pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy Sarcasm
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Howard Murphy Rimming
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Howard Murphy Hide and Seek
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Howard Murphy Milking
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Howard Murphy Professional Wrestling
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James Cully did anyone say kabadi?July 25 at 4:27pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Hurling
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Paul Finn Stem Cell Arrangement.
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Paul Finn Confused rambling
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Howard Murphy Bullimia
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Paul Finn Weevil dancing
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Howard Murphy the 200 metres sphincter clenchJuly 25 at 4:32pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Trouser Snake TeasingJuly 25 at 4:32pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy The Nazi hand grenade relayJuly 25 at 4:38pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Heavy Petting
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Howard Murphy Salad Dodging
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Howard Murphy Mass
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Howard Murphy Countdown
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Paul Finn Candid bickering
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Howard Murphy Dreaming
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Paul Finn Bacon GazingJuly 25 at 4:48pm via mobile ·
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Alan Bourke Furtling
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Howard Murphy Bacon GlazingJuly 25 at 4:48pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Pantaloon CanoodlingJuly 25 at 4:48pm · · 1
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Paul Finn The March Of The Penguins
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Howard Murphy Naval Gazing
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Howard Murphy The Village People Workout
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Howard Murphy Crucifixion
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Howard Murphy Fig Rolling
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Paul Finn Humming
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Howard Murphy Cat Felching
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Howard Murphy Quidditch
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Howard Murphy The Batdance
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Howard Murphy Powerpoint PresentationsJuly 25 at 5:05pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Icky Ocky Horse’s GockyJuly 25 at 5:12pm · · 2
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James Cully TetrisJuly 25 at 5:12pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy The Hail MaryJuly 25 at 5:13pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Musical ChairsJuly 25 at 5:15pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy All day drinkingJuly 25 at 5:17pm · · 1
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Paul Finn Icky Ocky Out
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Paul Finn Carrot FellatingJuly 25 at 5:18pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy Glory Holing
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Howard Murphy Gladitorial Combat
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Howard Murphy Cribbage
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Paul Finn Anal Bleaching
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Howard Murphy who can run the 100m the slowestJuly 25 at 5:20pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Tender loving
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Paul Finn Croc botheringJuly 25 at 5:21pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy Carp adorationJuly 25 at 5:22pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Shed building
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Paul Finn 100m Clitoral Stimulation
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Paul Finn The Long MuffJuly 25 at 5:23pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy Innuendo BingoJuly 25 at 5:24pm · · 1
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Howard Murphy Seppuku
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Paul Finn Cuckoo Arousal
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Howard Murphy Clock suckingJuly 25 at 5:26pm · · 1
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Paul Finn Lol
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Howard Murphy Dildo decoration
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Paul Finn Scrotal gratingJuly 25 at 5:28pm via mobile ·
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Paul Finn The Vinegar Stroke
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Howard Murphy Sheep bothering
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Sean Diamond Tiddlywinks
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Howard Murphy Gentle JumpingJuly 25 at 5:29pm · · 1
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Paul Finn Cornice Rotating
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Paul Finn If you get caught you have to hold the ladderJuly 25 at 5:32pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy 5000m ethnic cleansing
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Howard Murphy BlackguardmentJuly 25 at 5:37pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy Jiggery PokeryJuly 25 at 5:37pm via mobile ·
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Howard Murphy GenuflectionJuly 25 at 5:38pm via mobile ·
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Paul Finn Obese Ostrich WrestlingJuly 25 at 5:43pm via mobile ·
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Paul Finn Stairlift Racing
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Paul Finn The Michael Owen bench press
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Howard Murphy Drug test dodging
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James Cully Fail…Drug test dodging is already in the OlympicsJuly 25 at 5:48pm · · 1
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Paul Finn Synchronized ejaculation
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Paul Finn Irish 100m lying
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Paul Finn We’re expected to well in that one
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Howard Murphy Kitten dressage
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Howard Murphy Smoking
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Paul Raeside Pocket billiards
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Paul Finn The Ronan Keating “Please God” deity appeasement raceJuly 25 at 6:45pm via mobile ·
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Richard Hammond Muff DivingJuly 25 at 7:37pm via mobile ·
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William Carrick pussy willow.July 25 at 9:32pm · · 1
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Paul Finn The .00000001 micron paramecium dash
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Howard Murphy HamletJuly 26 at 6:33am via mobile ·
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Joé Hall toilet pushups
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Howard Murphy Mowl
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