I mean, probably not, but stranger things have happened...
Wenger's team has been crying out for a nasty b*****d for years. Look no further.
Talk about a slice of bad Loïc...
Congrats, Arsene, lad - you actually bought a player you needed. This is PROGRESS.
Like most great bands Smoove & Turrell are adept at mining their influences, for these Geordie boys it's Stax and Philly soul
With the club looking likely to lose out on the mercurial Remy, could the athletic Colombian be the ready replacement?
His parent club rejoined the Premier League yesterday, but it still looks like Loic Remy could be on his way out of QPR...
Our squad needs a clear out but after such a flat season, who would join us? One thing's for sure, even if we dumped Pardew it'd only be more of ...
Space-bound Kev misses the old days, and decides to pen a letter to his old number two, Terry McDermott...
The Toon Army may want Pardew out, but there's much bigger problems at Newcastle than the manager...
Pardew's promised that his return will signal a return to form for our side but I'm not so sure... Just look what i...
Arsene needs a striker if he's going to be able to progress with Arsenal and Loic Remy just happens to have a very ...
There's nothing left to play for, but these gutless and abysmal performances can simply not be accepted...
If Newcastle can keep key players fit and stop Carver from pulling out a pool cue on the touchline we just might be...
With twelve players potentially leaving Newcastle this summer, who should stay? And who should get outta Toon?
The team have shown no fight, heart or desire of late, but they now have twelve games to rescue their season – and potentially their careers.
He came, he saw, he sold our best players and made Ashley a pretty penny - thank God JFK's gone but why the hell was he brought in in the first p...
That's just what Moyes needs in midfield: a man for whom snapping into tackles and keeping the ball ticking over is just dialy routine. Sorry, Ph...
The sale of our best player midway through the season is just another in a series of serious slaps to the faces of the Newcastle faithful...
Apparently we're known for being short of patience but, no matter what some fat bloke at the Daily Mail said, thank...
We've had a rubbish start to the year and I'm worried Andy Carroll might come back to haunt us but I can't help but...
Tiote's unfairly chalked off goal typifies our run since Christmas, we've been unlucky but if Pards doesn't win nex...
From top six to bottom six to top six again - will the real Newcastle United please stand up?
Our problems have stayed off the field and we've got a squad full of quality, dump some dead weight, pray Pardew stays sane and we might just be ...
Match-winner Cabaye's suspension leaves Pardew with some tinkering to do but a result against out-of-sorts Saints leaves us in Europa spots - fin...
With his most naturally gifted player currently warming the bench, just how can Pardew incorporate the mercurial Frenchman into his in-form Newca...
With Luuk de Jong looking unsettled in Germany, reports suggest that Newcastle might be back in the hunt for a move and it's not hard to see why....
Sick of fake sheikhs and oligarchs out to make a quick buck? Here's why English clubs should follow the example of ...
Strong, fast and more tricks than Paul Daniels, here's what Newcastle fans can expect from the United winger if the...
We've been supremely inconsistent so far this year and how we'll get on against Spurs is anyone's guess... Still, a...
A derby loss to Sunderland, severing ties with local press... Unless some urgency is injected into the side, things...
Newcastle and Sunderland contest one of football's oldest, greatest derbies today; here a Mackem tells you the ten things you're most likely to see.
To celebrate the Tyne-Wear derby tactics supremo Jonathan Wilson picks his all-time Sunderland dream team to face Viz founder Chris Donald's Newcastle United galacticos. But who will win?
Newcastle need to pull themselves together and give the great unwashed down the road a good hiding if we're going to turn this season around...
Remember, Geordie Shore is real. More than that, those halfwits represent the intellectual cream of Newcastle. If y...
Stevie G got his 100th Premier League goal but Liverpool may look back on this 2-2 draw at Newcastle as two points ...
Caribbean football is on the rise and here are five starlets Premier League clubs should go and snap up before some...
Newcastle fans thought Nicos Dabizas had just ballsed up, but Bergkamp's outrageous flick and cool finish is the gr...
Last weekend at Reading our boys from Sheffield proved why they're the greatest ...
Israel and its Western allies aren’t satisfied with occupation, murder and imp...
Len Brown pays tribute to an artist whose relationship with fame has always been...
Disney meets Trainspotting...
Watch the rapper call bullshit on the news channel's coverage of Ferguson.
The French are still reeling at the revelations of President François Hollande�...
This twee BBC shite's left us with a face like Dot Cotton licking piss off a net...
Seriously, he doesn't hold back...
Mummified monks, decapitated dolls and a real-life cremation experience. Sure.
Its popularity with teenagers was completely unexplainable, but Late Night Love ...
A well trained drill of snobbery which is a betrayal to the roots of the music t...
"Fuck you. Fedoras own hard"
Remember the first time you called a girl at home or fumbled a condom into your ...
You'll be doing this now...
That banana she starts to suck before cutting it up and throwing it aside? That ...
This is why there are so few gay players, black managers, women at boardroom lev...
That day. That fateful day. That fateful day when Beefy accidentally flaunted hi...
The song is just a little bit meh. But be prepared to be blown away by the video...